Shizuo vs Vampires
by Cookie-rookie
Summary: Shizuo was just minding his own business when IT happened, then suddenly he is in a place surrounded by sparkly people speaking a language he does not know with an annoying European Flea trying to recruit him. Slight OOC, violence, minor crack, and crude language. R


Disclaimer: I do not own any of the characters that are featured in this story.

Pairings: Cannon for Twilight, and none for Durarara

Summary: Shizuo was just minding his own business when IT happened, and then suddenly he is in a place surrounded by sparkly people speaking a language he doesnt know and an annoying European Flea trying to recruit him.

Main Character(s): Heiwajima Shizuo

Warnings: violence, minor crack, crude language, slight OOC, and non-edit grammar.

"_**Blah"**_ – English/foreign language other than Japanese

"Blah" - Japanese

'_Blah'_ – Celty's texting

'_Blah_' – Shizou's thoughts

* * *

The day had started off as normal as it could get in Ikebukuro for Shizuo.

Some yellow scarf punks picked a fight; he stopped by some houses to do his job, and then began his patrol of Ikebukuro. No sights of the Flea around and he hadn't caused **much** collateral damage in his fights. However, it was when Shizuo had met up with Celty that **It** showed up. **It** being some ashen, serpent-ish creep -was it a guy? Shizou didn't really care- running around waving a stick after some teens dressed in bathrobes.

At first Shizuo was going to do nothing –he had assumed they were some excentric tourists- however, that thought was changed when some green lighting demolished his cup of strawberry milk. It barely took Shizuo 3 seconds to realize what had happened.

'_Shizou don't do anything rash'_ Shizuo read when a phone was shoved under his nose. _'The vending machine is still working and you were almost done with your drink'_ Celty gesture to the machine behind her. _'In fact why don't I pay for the next one?'_.

Unfortunately it was at this moment -when Shizuo and Celty turned around to approach the machine- that one of the cosplying morons waved their stick causing the vending machine to blow up. By the time Celty had even finished typing Shizuo's name, the damage was already done. Shizuo had picked up the closest object next to him –that being Celty **and** her motorcycle- and tossed it at the annoying vending-machine-killers. Or at least he would have if one of the foreigners hadn't directed some purple lightning at him and Celty.

The last thing that Shizuo saw before vanishing away in the smoke, caused by the purple lightning, was that reptilian foreigner blowing up another vending machine.

/

When the smoke had started to clear Shizuo was no longer holding Celty's bike –and herself- ready to throw at the foreigners. However what Shizuo did see was a long haired, European version of the Flea looking at him with cold -red- eyes.

"_**What do we have here?"**_ Shizuo didn't care or particularly notice that the European Flea was speaking a language he didn't know. For all Shizuo needed to know was that the European Flea sounded and looked just like the Flea back at home.

"Hmmm you are Japanese yes?" The European Flea asked in a haughty voice that had Shizuo clenching his fist in pure rage. "And a human no doubt" a similar smirk appeared along with that and Shizuo's blood started to boil "Do you know how you got here? Wel-" The European Flea never finished for Shizuo punched the Flea through a nearby row of trees.

And then it was a battle-royal as the sparkly people that stood behind the European Izaya started to attack Shizuo. It wasn't until the third person that Shizuo had realized that the sparkly people were not normal **and** he didn't need to hold back his punches.

'_Great, I can hit them harder than normal' _Shizuo thought as he leered at the oncoming crowd of more sparkling fleas.

"_**Stop"**_ the European Flea demanded as he reappeared in front of Shizuo again, and slowly the crowd of sparkly people surrounding Shizuo dispersed. _**"Do not attack him."**_ The European Flea commanded as walked closer to Shizuo. "You are no normal human" The European Flea said as he leaned his face close to Shizuo so that their noses were touching.

The European Flea gripped Shizuo's chin as he took a deep breath -Shizuo squirmed in the tight grip- as the Flea stared into his eyes with a mild look of shock on his face.

"Back off Flea" Shizuo said through clenched teeth as he grabbed the European Flea's wrist and started to squeeze.

"And your Strength" the European Flea purred as he sniffed the air around Shizuo "It is simply monster like" Shizuo didn't just punch the Flea across the field, he threw him and this time he was prepared for the sparkly European Flea's groupies. Shizuo had put his special made Celty-gloves on and was punching the sparkly bastards into the lake and farther beyond.

It wasn't until nearly all of the sparkly people that had attacked him were tossed into a nearby lake, when Shizuo noticed the others that were across the field from him. It was also then that Shizuo noted he didn't care about them since they were just gawking and not attacking.

When clapping was heard Shizuo noticed that the Euro Flea was back up and annoying as ever.

"Truly amazing!" The European Flea exclaimed as he stooped clapping. "Such power! I wonder how stronger you would be if turned?" The European Flea hummed to himself as he stalked around Shizuo. "Would you like to become immortal, human?" He asked in a contemptuous voice.

Shizuo's grip tightened to such an amount that his palm started to bleed.

"What an aroma!" The European Flea sniffed the air around Shizuo "I should figure that one with such immense strength should have an abnormally sweet aroma to their blood." The Flea shifted closer to Shizuo "I wonder"-a glance was tossed towards Shizuo's fist- "If your blood has a unique taste as well?" Shizuo paid no mind to the commotion behind him as he counted to ten.

It took all the patience and self-control that Shizuo had to not toss the damn Euro Flea into the farthest ocean away.

"Listen you damn flea" Shizuo might have been worried about breaking his teeth as he grounded them heavily. "I don't know where I am but if you come closer to me than I will-" Shizuo didn't complete his sentence as one of the sparkly people –one of the ones that originally weren't attacking him- tried to bite him.

Quicker than most would have expected from Shizuo, he flung a fist into the assaulter's mouth.

"_**Jasper!" **_A woman from the non-attacking group yelled as she appeared next to the blonde. _**"do not do this to yourself-!" **_The woman never finished what she had to say.

Before anyone knew it, his patience snapped. With a loud roar of pure fury Shizuo grabbed the hair of the blonde that was biting him and_ pulled_.

"Let go!" He roared as he yanked the blonde off his fist with pure force and with strength that Shizuo never knew he had, he tossed the blonde up into the air.

There was silence all around as they waited for the blonde to come back down to the ground. After a minute of waiting, the small brunette woman started to cry.

A low whistle was heard as a small group of dark teenagers, with only pants on, walked out into the clearing.

"_**Damn, did he go high!" **_

"_**Think he's ever coming down?"**_

"_**Not a clue"**_

"_**Hey I think I heard him pop out of the atmosphere!"**_

Shizuo didn't understand a single word that hey said, but from the awed looks he was getting he really didn't care.

"_**Yeah we got another flea hater up in here!" **_one of the teenagers said as he approached Shizuo.

Shizuo shot the boy a look.

"_**Erk !"**_ The teen gulped _**"So he's not friendly in general"**_

Shizuo still didn't care what the teens were saying, because the European Flea was still looking at him.

" . ?" Shizuo punctuated as he glared at the Euro Flea.

"I want you" The smile that was flashed made Shizuo want to retch. "Do you want more power?" Shizuo took a deep breath and clenched his fist.

"_**Don't listen to him!"**_ Someone shouted at Shizuo, and soon everyone in the clearing was shouting.

"_**Leave him alone!"**_

"_**Stay out of Volturi's way, Cullen"**_

"_**If you bite him, this means war!"**_

With all the shouting and clamoring no one heard the sound of a horse approaching. Neither did they see the ticking of Shizuo's left eyebrow increasing either.

"Shut up!" Shizuo snapped as the he glared at those that were talking "I don't understand you, nor do I care what you have to say! Just take me back home!" He yelled.

Soon the clearing became eerily quiet and the sound of a horse's hooves echoed loudly.

"Celty" Shizuo grunted as he crossed his arms.

"_**What type of bike is that"**_ one of the teens sighed dreamily as Celty appeared in the clearing.

"_**More visitors"**_ Someone said and looks were shot between the sparkly people. _**"Who could have invited them"**_ more accusing looks were tossed around.

Celty appeared in front of Shizuo, her cellphone already out before she pulled to a stop. She began typing hastily before even getting off of the bike.

'_Alien invasion has started!'_ Shizuo worried for a moment that Celty phone was going to break with how harshly she was pressing the keys down, _'get on now! Hurry! Save people!' _

Now Shizuo wasn't one to normally go around and save people. However he didn't even have the chance to decline Celty as she man-handled him onto the back of her bike. They took off loudly and speed through the trees at a fast pace that made Shizuo grip Celty tighter.

"_**I request that you put that man down." **_The European Flea appeared in front of them _**"He is going to join-"**_ Shizuo smirked as Celty ran right through the flea not even noticing.

His smirk was wiped off his face as more of the sparkly people started to chase after them. Fortunately there was a poof and Shizuo – along with Celty and her bike- disappeared in a gray puff of smoke.

/

A/N: I'm considering whether or not to write a story on where Celty went. Currently I do not know where she should go, if any one has any ideas please share them with me. When sharing your ideas, leave them in a review and tell me why you would like to see Celty go there and what characters you want to have her interact with. Congratulations to anyone who knows which character (including which fandom they are from) that destroyed the vending machines.

Read and review.


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